Is there ever a situation where quotes from Mean Girls can’t be applied? Nope. Even “you go, Glen Coco has become my slang for “well done”. Anyway, that bit in the movie where Lindsay Lohan (in what will probably go down as her best role – yikes!) as newgirl on the high school scene discovers that you don’t dress scary for Hallowe’en anymore, you slut it up? How true was that?
Mean Girls is just a movie and I am not in high school but the obsession with making even the most innocent costume “sexy” has bothered me for years. Why do women zealously need to inject sex appeal into this occasion? Can’t we just “be”?
I can hear all the fans of “Sexy Cinderella”, “Sexy Amanda Knox” and maybe even “Sexy Gaddafi” shouting “It’s just a bit of fun!” Yeah ok, I get it, it’s one night a year and surely the whole ethos of dressing up means you should kiss your inhibitions goodbye and hey, if you wanna look like a hooker, so what? I love playing dress up as much as the next person but how has it gotten to the stage where if I wanted to dress as Elizabeth Bathory, for example, (she was the alleged inspiration for Dracula so that’s a pretty apt costume, right?) that would be weird or, even better, I’d be expected to be the Page 3 version of Bathory instead. If a man dresses as Charles Manson, he’s not gonna show up to the party looking like Tom Cruise is he? Nor is he expected to.
Why does everything have to be like a hooker? Well, every costume for women. Jesus, I’ve even seen a slutty Finding Nemo. Anyway, my point is, I find it pretty sad that women are a) expected to slut it up and b) are excited at the prospect. Why? Because I can’t help but think that the whole “oh great, Hallowe’en is coming up, I wanna dress up as xxx but how do I make it sexual?” is yet another sign of patriarchy (well, are the men also doing this? No, of course not) and also a sign of how complicit women are in the wicked ways of patriarchy.
As I see girls discuss their “slutty witch” costumes online, I think my God, can’t we just enjoy Hallowe’en like men do? Do we really have to turn another occasion into a competitive judge-me-on-my-looks-boys beauty pageant? As if we don’t have enough of that every single day anyway. Is our collective self-esteem that low that we need to turn Hallowe’en into Socially Acceptable Day of Sexism? Because that’s what you’re all doing with your carefully planned, revealing and completely bimbo costumes, make no mistake.
The obsession women have with sexing it up for Oct 31st makes me think some women harbour yearnings towards a pre-Women’s Lib time. Why else, when you can dress as literally anything in the world, would you jump at the opportunity to sell yourself as a hot bit of ass, er, dressed as a pumpkin, jar of pasta sauce or Disney princess (the porno versions)? The relish some women display at the idea of being able to be a sex object/slut for a night, you know without feeling embarrassed or like your “sisters” will make you feel bad for setting feminism back about 200 years, well it’s nothing short of spectacular.
The most offensive ones to me personally are the “sexy” versions of male dominated professions where women still experience constant misogyny: sexy versions of police officers, plumbers, builders, surgeons. And yet some silly bitches think it’s cool to dress up in a tits-out get up as one of these professions and tell everyone who sees her that yes, forget doing these jobs well, this (half-naked body in a stupid costume) is all we’re good for. Sorry guys but we were just play acting by being solicitors and doctors in real life. Oh hardy har har, what a great joke. Pass me a sickbag.
We are objectified every….single….day in our every day clothes, whether that’s a doctor’s uniform or garage overalls and yet Hallowe’en has become the unspoken occasion to allow it and where this is cool. Because women, by buying these outfits or squeezing into a ten year old school uniform, are letting it. So to summarise, sexy Hallowe’en costumes exist to remind us that no matter what women do, it doesn’t matter as long as you’re a sex object while you do it.
As for me, this Hallow’s Eve I’ll be rocking as a very unsexy Garth from Wayne’s World. Anyone wanna be Wayne?